Archive for the ‘Ben Wallace’ category

BREAKING NEWS: Bulls trade one albatross for another

February 21, 2008

Just beating the trade deadline, the Bulls dealt Ben Wallace and Joe Smith to the Cleveland Cavaliers for Drew Gooden, Larry Hughes, Cedric Simmons, and Shannon Brown.

Seattle also dealt Wally Szerbiak and Delonte West to the Cavs for Adrian Griffin, Ira Newble, and Donyell Marshall as the third team in the deal.

Ben Wallace

Its truly a happy day in Chicago. Yes, I know that Larry Hughes is also an expensive piece of crap who shoots under 37 percent and doesn’t like to, well, pass the ball. And Drew Gooden is nothing special. But getting rid of the piece of absolute crap that is Ben Wallace is a great move in of itself.

Wallace was signed as a team leader, defensive beast and rebounding monster. Instead, in just under two seasons as a Bull, Wallace continuously clashed with management, threw teammates under the bus, and averaged 5.7 ppg and 9.5 rpg. Oh, and he was making nearly $15 million per year.

What do the Bulls do now? Eh, I don’t think it matters. Assuming Luol Deng and Ben Gordon are now healthy (which doesn’t seem likely considering both looked very uninterested and eager to get ‘re-injured’ last night), the Bulls rotation will include Deng, Gordon, Hinrich, Sefolosha, Nocioni, Gooden, Hughes, Noah, Duhon, and Tyrus Thomas, with a little bit of Aaron Gray and Cedric Simmons thrown in for good measure. Thats a whole lot of crap.

But at least Big Ben will no longer be clogging up the middle, doing absolutely nothing but missing wide open shots and tapping out totally grabbable rebounds to the opposing team. Now we get to watch Larry take 24 shitty shots before missing three weeks due to an injury. More entertaining, I think.

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thank you bulls for freeing the headband

October 2, 2007

Head-Banned? No Longer – Just Headband!!

i have a strange obsession with headbands. i have an orange one that i have been wearing since i went to the final four in st. louis when dee brown and deron williams were leading the illini. my friends that night couldnt stop making fun of me when they saw me wearing it. their opinion slowly changed as people were offering me twenties to sell them the headband. i refused. i wear it whenever i go snowboarding and always have women come up and compliment me. so i am never gonna stop wearing it and you guys will never stop hating on me.

finally the bulls have come to my side and are gonna allow big ben wallace to wear the headband. sort-of. the bulls still have a ‘no headband’ rule for their players. however, there is now a big ben clause to that rule. the bulls left it up to the players to allow mr. wallace to wear his signature headband and since they are not idiots – they decided to let him wear it.

the headband gathered national attention last year when it was worn and ben wallace was benched for violating a team rule. i always found it ironic that in the ads around chicago for the bulls ben was always wearing the headband. the lack of the headband contributed to a lack of production for the playoffs. the headband would have been a huge factor and its importance has not been discussed enough.

“Hopefully, that will translate into more blocked shots, more rebounds and more steals,” joked teammate Ben Gordon.

oh please ben gordon. hope?! i think you know what this does for your team and chances at perhaps making it to the finals this year. its enormous and you know inside your heart that by christmas you will buy every player on the team a headband and perhaps an under appreciated wrist band and the entire rule will be taken off the books as the bulls roll over the non-headband wearing opponents.

with this announcement – i think its times to start thinking about the nba. my preseason mvp is – the headband and possibly a co-mvp with the fro. because they go together like peanut butter and jelly.